Annoyed but Thankful!

During my bridal shower, the guests played a game where they wrote down tidbits of advice for me to read throughout my marriage. Overwhelmingly, the advice was….

I will admit that while I have tried to adhere to that advice, that has not always been the case. In the last eight years of our marriage, I have gone to bed angry with him more times than I care to admit. In recent times though, I have gotten much better. We have gotten better at this. However, within the last few weeks, I have noticed that I have increasingly become agitated with him and for nothing and everything. It is not even his fault most of the time. I was just annoyed. Things that had never bothered me before were all of a sudden, the biggest source of angst for me. Like, he just always seemed to be making too much noise. He chewed too loudly; I could hear when he swallowed his drink; the way he dug into a bag of chips was too loud; he coughed too loud; sneezed too loud; he was just loud ….. see, this was me, not him.

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How could I be annoyed because he coughed too loudly? But, I was, and this led me to not being so nice to him until …..

Until the moment God opened my eyes and showed me just how precious and short life is. I was driving and thankfully, not texting. As I pulled out of the middle of the street to make a left turn when my light turned yellow and was on its way to red, a car, traveling in the opposite direction, saw his yellow light as a challenge. I was just beginning to move and maybe traveling at a rate of 5 miles an hour when I heard God’s voice say stop. His car was traveling through the intersection at what I estimated as easily 65 mph. As I sat stopped in the middle of the street paralyzed because I was told to stop, I saw the man narrowly miss my car. I heard his tires screech and could smell the rubber from his tires burning trying to stop. I could see the sheer panic and terror on his face at the thought of crashing into me. And just like that, God moved his car around mine. Just like that, I had been given another chance at life. Just like that, I was reminded of whose I am. Just like that, I was reminded that life is precious, and I had not been treating my husband’s as such.

It was then that I realized the import of the advice I was given at my bridal shower. And while this advice isn’t limited to spouses or significant others, I was reminded then to treat my husband a little better. It would have been horrible if I left him with the memory of me being rude and sarcastic with him this morning instead of loving and caring. It would be devastating that I had not kissed him goodbye this morning; that my I love you came with a twinge of “you get on my nerves!”

I am thankful that I got to call him and tell him with a sincere heart that I love him, cherish him, adore him, and apologize for my tone with him this morning. I apologized for being outright mean to him. I pledged to myself to do better; to be better. I am thankful!

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